Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Buhtt sex?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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