u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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