I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Randomize
