you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
