Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize