i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize