I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
