As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
