stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
