I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
