we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize