Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
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She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
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I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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