Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize