oh god the rape fog is back!
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I cut my penus on the lid.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
