R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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