Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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