yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
