I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
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