I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
