You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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