Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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