best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Randomize
