i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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