For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
birth control should be required to get into college
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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