I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I'm both gender and math confused
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
