So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
