The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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