That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Boobs are out for the taking
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes