I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
