its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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