people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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