so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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