I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
