Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
You're a waste of cheezeits
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
