I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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