just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
and she was petting her beer can
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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