I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
