I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
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