just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
