hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
