is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
