I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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