I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
