"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
