I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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