He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
