THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize