Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
