I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
