my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Dating After Heartbreak
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened