The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
